Today, my shirt is too small.

I should have expected it.

I get bigger every day, although I eat very little. My esophagus burns all the time and no amount of tums or acid reducer really helps.

But today, for some reason, I picked out this shirt. It’s not even a maternity shirt, for heaven’s sake.

And the pants I chose to wear sit conveniently UNDER this massive belly that I’m sporting. Yeah, I look totally businesslike.

I don’t know what I was thinking.

It sucks, and I have to pee.